It’s Friday, ya bastids!

A bridge in Washington state collapsed last night after a truck hit the side of it. I’m not an engineer, but I do think bridges should be able to withstand a collision from a vehicle. Two vehicles were plunged into the Skagit River, but nobody was killed—miraculously. And it seems that we’re going to have to depend on miracles from here on out. Republicans sure won’t let us spend the money to maintain our infrastructure. This bridge was built in 1955. There are pontoon bridges that American troops built to invade Germany in World War II that lasted longer.

The bridge collapse cut off the main route from Seattle to Canada. Great—now people who are trying to flee America’s crumbling infrastructure can’t even get out of the country! The United States is becoming a Third World country. And I say that at the risk of angering people in the Third World. People in Cameroon will hear that and think “Hey! We have our problems, but our bridges can still stand after being hit by a truck.”

It looks like the lawyers for George Zimmerman have settled on their strategy for defending him—continue Zimmerman’s attack on Trayvon Martin. Zimmerman’s attorneys have released images taken from Trayvon’s cell phone of pot plants and a handgun. Beyond poisoning the jury pool, I’m not sure what the point of releasing these pictures is. Did George Zimmerman become afraid for his life while he was thumbing through Trayvon Martin’s cell phone? Maybe Zimmerman’s lawyers are going to argue that Trayvon was armed with a picture of a gun.

Newsbusters took exception to my statement that Bill O’Reilly is more likely to have sex slaves in his basement than Barack Obama. Come on! Bill O’Reilly is more likely to have sex slaves in his basement than the Marquis de Sade. The comments section was interesting. It looked like the transcript of a meeting of a therapy group for people who had been caught with sex slaves in their basement.

Fox News host Andrea Tantaros has asked Fox viewers to go out and punch someone who voted for Obama in the face. Well, if they pick somebody at random, chances are over 50 percent that they voted for Obama. That’s why he won.

The jury in the penalty phase of the Jodi Arias trial couldn’t decide if she should die. I just wish this story would die. I don’t know if Arias will get the death penalty or life in jail. I just know I feel like I’ve been sentenced to life watching the Jodi Arias trial.

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When delivering the commencement address at the U.S. Naval Academy, President Obama made it clear to the graduates/future military leaders, that there is no place for sexual assault in America’s armed forces...